Tuesday, July 2, 2013

"I feel so sorry for you!"

This has been on my mind since last night and I just cannot quite shake it.  We are all guilty of saying ignorant things, I'm sure I stick my foot in my mouth more often than I even realize!  With that being said, before I even write this post, I will say that I am going to try to be more conscious of what I say to people, especially strangers!

Last evening I ran an errand and since I am obviously pregnant, strangers are making comments, which is ok!  I absolutely love the question when I am alone, "Is this your first?"  Haha, the face change when I answer "No, it's my 5th" is so funny!  People think you are insane or just don't understand how this keeps happening.

I got the question last night, then it rolled into gender.  Another girl.  Yes I have all girls.  To this, the stranger proceeds to laugh, as do I.  She continues with "Oh MY GAWD, I feel sooo sorry for you!"  Mind you, I have never met this person in my life.  I did not complain about having girls.  I just kindof laugh it off and say "it's what we do!"  The woman goes on and on about how horrible it must be with all the hormones in the house, how terrible it will be when they all grow up, and how sorry she feels for me (about 5 more times).

I am so glad I was alone, my girls do not need to listen to that.  They do not need to think that they are all just a product of trying to get that perfect boy so we can finally stop having children.  I get that most people think that we have tried (and tried and tried again) to have a boy but we have not.  At one point, Greg and I both thought a boy would be nice but quite honestly, we were hoping this one was a girl!  Can you imagine bringing a boy into a house full of sisters and being the youngest and only one?  We would have been thrilled but God did not make a mistake with this one, or the other 4! 

As this woman continued ranting about how horrible having 5 girls would be, I just kept thinking, "lady, if you only knew, you would feel really horrible!"  5 girls is a dream.  Five healthy, living, breathing children...is a dream!  Our reality is that this will only be our 4th one at home.  Olivia died and here we are just wishing we could have that 5th girl at home to just have be so dreadful, awful, hormone filled.  It made me sick. 

I do not blame people for their comments, having that many girls in a row is quite the conversation starter but this was just over the top.  It has made me think A LOT today of what I find myself saying.  I try not to complain about my husband to friends, especially in public but what if I did find myself doing that and a widow was overhearing what I had to say.  Yes, marriage is not perfect but I'm sure a woman who is missing her husband would much rather have him home being a slob than to never see him again!  Work on the slob at home, just do not throw a fit about it in public.  (I am guilty of this myself, I love you Greg but the dirty rolled up socks....see I'm guilty too!)

Ephesians 4:29~ Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.